A Single Mom’s Story of Hope & Surviving Domestic Abuse
I want to share a story that I received from a woman named Randa. This content is from an email and is very sensitive and may bother you if you have suffered from domestic abuse.
I did not alter this email or Randa’s words….
A Letter on Surviving Domestic Abuse
“I hope this message finds you. My name is Randa and I am a survivor of domestic abuse. This is the first time I share my story publicly. At the age of 16, my parents decided it was best for me marry a man I didn’t want to marry. I went through with it because I didn’t know what else to do. I was born and raised in the suburbs of Chicago, to Palestinian parents, and they thought spending the summer in the Palestine would help us better learn the language and culture so my siblings and I packed for what we thought was summer vacation, and ended up being far more. It was decided that my fate would be to marry a man that I didn’t want to marry, and actually had no interest in marriage at all, especially at that age (16), as I had so many more goals I aspired to. Despite my resistance, it happened and I got married. Shortly there after I got pregnant and spent time in the hospital because of the physical abuse.
I had no prenatal care and I had no idea the condition of my baby.
I was finally able to speak with my parents, who went back to the states after I married, and who had no idea of the torture I was enduring. I told my mom that I was dying and my baby wouldn’t survive if I didn’t escape the hell I was living. She went to straight to Chicago O’Hare airport and flew out with a mission to rescue me and my unborn baby. My mom made it to Palestine when I was 8 months pregnant and enlisted the help of the United States embassy who put me in protection for 5 days since my husband took my identity and I needed a new passport to travel. I had armed guards with me even as I boarded the plane to ensure my safety and I made it back to the states in December of 1995.
My son was born the next month in January of 1996
When I arrived, I finally had an ultrasound at the university of Chicago, which informed me it was a boy who had a deformity. His kidneys were misshaped and he would be handicapped. I was devastated! The abuse caused this. There were four doctors in the delivery room when I went into labor, all prepared for the worst. As was I. To all of our surprise, my son was born perfectly healthy, and I tear just writing this because I’m recalling the anxiety and sadness I felt on that day, followed by amazing happiness. My story is that of survival. I am now 44 years old and my son, Adam, is 26 and a graduate of a Master’s degree program at Georgetown University in Washington DC. He’s my miracle. Life as a teenage mother was brutal but I was determined to give my son the best possible chance for success. I did not want him to be a statistic being raised by a single parent.
Randa’s Hope for the Single Moms Reading This
“I don’t seek anything from this other than to inspire moms that feel alone with a journey ahead to face by themselves. YOU CAN DO THIS. Listen, it’s not easy. I know. But take it one day at a time and make your child a priority and encourage their interests at a young age. It’s hard to tell what their interests are when they’re young but it’s up to us as moms to to expose our children to various activities and experiences to determine potentially what their passions may be. Look at your baby and want for them better than what you had. I truly hope this helps and I welcome questions should you have any.”
We Are Thankful for Women Who Are Willing to Share
I am grateful to Randa for sharing her story with us. I am so encouraged to know that she finds sharing her story of great value that she took the time to write it down.
If you want to share your story with us for Single Mom Spot, we are starting a new campaign called the Single Mom Diaries. Randa’s entry will be our first!
If you are a single mom that wants to get involved, please consider sharing:
- How you become a single mom
- Words of inspiration, advice or encouragement
- Words of wisdom
- What you struggle with
- What you hope for
- What helps you find strength
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